


For Better or For Worse

by felicitymeagansmoak



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: 4x10, Angst, F/M, Flash Forward
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-21
Updated: 2016-01-21
Packaged: 2018-05-15 07:09:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,360
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5776303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/felicitymeagansmoak/pseuds/felicitymeagansmoak
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a little speculation fic about what I want to happen in the flash forward. Its a one-shot as of right now, but if you guys like it I would love to write more!</p>
            </blockquote>





	For Better or For Worse

As Oliver slowly climbs into the limo he lets out a small sigh of relief, She’s still here, he thinks. He wonders every time he sees her face, lately, if it will be the last time. She’s been so distant for the past few months; he is doing everything he can just to keep her in his sights. He has to physically stop himself from reaching for her, his hand twitches, defying the instinct its known since the day he first touched her shoulder. 

_“If you ever need to tell someone about your day, you can tell me.”_

The memory assaults his senses as he prays for self control, he can feel the way that she sucked in a breath that day, how she was shocked he would even touch her. He remembers the whispered, _“Thanks,”_ that she thought he didn’t hear. He tries to remember what it felt like to not be in love with Felicity Smoak, and that’s when his memory fails him. He can’t comprehend his life without her; he can’t even seem to complete memories that don’t include his overwhelming love for her. His body can’t forget what it feels like to touch her.

It’s his own fault, though, why he can’t close the distance between them, why he can’t pull her to him and hold her while she grieves. It’s his fault that he didn’t trust the strength of their relationship enough to tell her the truth about his son. Well, maybe its not that he didn’t trust her love for him; maybe he just didn’t trust that he would ever truly deserve it. He’s always been a self-sabotaging son of a bitch that way…at least that’s what Thea tells him.

He realizes that the silence has become deafening, and the tension is too much to bear, he strangles out a simple, “Are you okay?”

He doesn’t really expect much of an answer from her, the only time she’s talked to him lately is over the comms, guiding him and the team; even then she tries to address the rest of the team more often than himself. 

“Are you?” she deflects. He knows he shouldn’t have truly expected her to answer, but for some reason he always hopes when it comes to Felicity. 

“You know what you have to do, right?” she questions, coldly. “You have to kill the son of a bitch.” Those are words he’s only ever heard come out of her mouth one time before, when he went to fight Ra’s Al Ghul, right before the first time he told her he loved her. He looks over at her now and sees a completely different expression on her face. This is not Felicity’s look of worry and love, it’s a look of revenge that he has never seen on her before.

In the months that passed since the accident he has seen defeat, depression and determination, when she first thought she would end up paralyzed. He saw insecurity when she thought he wasn’t with her in the hospital because she thought he had changed his mind about being with her. He even saw anger when his secret had finally been revealed to her by means of Damien Dahrk’s wife in the middle of a mayoral debate; but he had never ever seen this look before.

He said nothing in return; there really wasn’t anything he could say. They rode back to Diggle’s apartment in silence, where Felicity had been staying. She had wanted to run, to leave the team, to leave him, but it was Lyla that had convinced her not to. Oliver still doesn’t know what the older woman said to Felicity the night of the debate that made her stay, but he is forever grateful for whatever it was. 

As they pulled up to the building, he couldn’t take the silence anymore. “Felicity, please talk to me. I know you’re hurting, we all are, just please stop shutting me out,” he pleaded. 

“What do you want me to say, Oliver? She was my friend, she was your ex-girlfriend, and she was like a sister to Thea. I don’t know what to say, I don’t have the words. She fought when no one else could stand to anymore and she’s gone because of it. If I hadn’t been so afraid to come down to the lair, if I could have just gotten over my shit I could have been her back up. I could have helped her and I didn’t! I didn’t do anything because I was too busy nursing my broken heart! Is that what you want me to say? You want me to tell you that its MY fault? Well there you go Oliver, I hope you’re happy!” she cried as she threw the door open and took off toward the lobby of Diggle’s building.

Everything in him told him it was smart to let her go, to let her grieve and to let her process be whatever she needed it to be, it told him that she wasn’t his anymore and he didn’t get to chase after her; but there was the tiny part of his brain that said, _Fuck it!_

He jumped out of the car without any regard to the driver asking him where he wanted to be dropped off, Verdant or the Loft. He ran up the stairs she had headed up only seconds before him and he grabbed her wrist. She spun around and looked at him like he had two heads before yelling, “what the hell, Oliver?! What do you think you’re doing?”

He took a deep breath, “Felicity! Just listen to me, for one minute; please?” He paused to see what her response would be, if she told him to leave her alone, he would. He loved her enough to respect her wishes, but all she did was give a slight nod of her head, so subtle that most people wouldn’t have seen it.   
“The last time we talked, well I guess you talked and then kind of stormed away, rightfully so, but still I-“ he paused. He hasn’t even had a real conversation with her in months and her rambling is still rubbing off on him. “The last time we talked, I didn’t get to explain. Mostly because you didn’t want to hear it, but also because I didn’t feel like I had a right, but the more that I think about it, and the further away you run, the more I know I need to tell you the whole truth.” He waited once more for her slight nod to proceed. 

“When we were in Central City, the day that I found out about William, you cornered Barry and asked him about a Paternity Test he had run for me. Even the fastest man alive apparently can’t outthink you,” he chuckled at that, at just how amazing his girl is, before he continued. “I don’t know exactly what happened or how it went down, but we broke up after that.” 

“What do you mean? Oliver, you’re not making any sense,” Felicity asked, confusion clouding her face. 

“Savage beat us, everyone died, every single one of us, except for Barry. Barry survived long enough to run back in time. He saved everyone that way, but he warned me that if I had told you about William you would leave me. I was terrified, Felicity. This was all uncharted water for me and I couldn’t even imagine being able to navigate that without you by my side. I can’t imagine doing anything without you by my side anymore. You’re a part of me, I couldn’t let you go even if I wanted to, and I don’t want to. I know that you have to deal with this in your own way, on your own time, but its like I told you in the hospital that day; For Better or For Worse. I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere,” he sighed and before he turned away he grabbed her open hand and dropped her engagement ring in it. 

“Oliver!” she beckoned, “Just give me some time, okay? For Better or For Worse, remember?”


End file.
